There are many reasons for moving back in with parents: saving for a home, looking for a job, paying off student loans, and more. Whatever the reason for making this move, it’s still seems daunting after a taste of independence.
Today, about 37% of millennials move back home after graduation.
You may be dreading the thought of living under their roof and rule after enjoying the freedom of college life. Perhaps you don’t know how to approach them with issues, now that you have your own set of responsibilities. It’s not uncommon to have concerns.
Luckily, we’re here to help. Consider this post your complete survival guide to moving back in with parents, without feeling like you are taking a step back in life.
Tip #1 Set Boundaries Early
When you move back in with parents after graduation, you’re stepping into a much different relationship than the one you left when you were a teenager. While living in their household as an adult, you’ll need to re-define the boundaries of the relationship.
Before you move back in, have a conversation about essential things like household chores, money, groceries, cooking, privacy…etc. It is wise to have a similar discussion with your parents that you would have with a roommate. The goal is to establish clear expectations upfront. In doing so, you are less likely to run into issues down the road.
Tip #2 Be Considerate
Whereabouts:
If you’re going to be late for dinner or not coming home as planned, alleviate their worry with a text.
Guests:
Whether it is you or your parents having guests over, it’s always considerate for the other party to receive a little-advanced notice.
Respecting times and spaces:
Are there areas of the home you’d like to stay private? Perhaps there are times of the day where louder activities should be limited?
Pro-tip:
Independence is a double-edged sword. If you don’t want your parent handling your clothes from the dryer, be more proactive about following through.
Tip #3 Define Duties
As an adult, there are certain duties that you should own completely:
- Your laundry
- Your bedroom
- Your bathroom
- Your messes in common areas
In addition to your personal duties, it is a good idea to own some of the tasks that help with the upkeep of the rest of the house. A great rule of thumb when moving back in with parents is to create a breakdown of household duties that is fair for everyone. Put it somewhere visible, like the refrigerator.
Tip #4 Pay Some Expenses
Although your parents may insist they don’t need your help paying expenses, it’s a great idea to pay a portion of the utilities.
Even if they don’t need the money, they can tuck it aside for you. In that case, you can use it to purchase a house or for furnishing your apartment down the road. Not only is it a sign of respect to offer to pay some of the expenses, but additionally, it gets you in the habit of paying monthly bills.
Tip #5 Make Time for Your Parents
Tim Urban’s viral blog, “The Tail End,” gives a sobering statistic. By the time you graduate from high school, you’ve already spent 93% of the total time you have with your parents.
Moving back in with parents can be your last opportunity to cherish them gratefully. With this revelation, it’s time to make it count.
Set weekly lunch dates, create new memories, and explore new experiences together. Above all, learn what you can from them, especially the things you want to pass on to your family.
Tip #6 Purge Before You Move
Do your parents a favor: don’t show up at their place with every single belonging you’ve ever put your hands on. Instead, purging your place a bit is a great practice prior to moving back in with parents. Here are the benefits:
- Your move-in will be faster and your move out will be easier
- You are displaying respect by keeping their space organized
- Your new space will be less cluttered, therefore making you feel more grown up
After purging, you may still have furniture or keepsakes that you don’t want to part wth, but also won’t need in their house. In that case, consider storage to hold the items until you’re ready to pick them up again.
Tip #7 Set a Timeline
When you’re moving back in with parents, the assumption is that you’ll move back out again. You’re not setting up shop forever. Maybe you want to save a certain amount for a down payment for a house, or maybe you’re on the hunt for that dream job.
Whatever the case may be, be sure to set a timeline when you move back in with your folks. With this intention, everyone has an idea of what to expect. Above all, it can help prevent misunderstandings and frustration. Plus, it’s always fine to shorten or extend the timeline as necessary.
Tip #8 Be Proactive About Your Goals
Moving back in with parents sometimes makes it too easy to slip back into a routine where they take care of everything by default. Yet, lounging around with your feet up won’t pay off.
Keep in mind, you moved back into your parents’ house to meet some sort of goal, and you’ll only get there if you’re proactive about that objective.
Weekly Objectives Example:
- Job hunting: Submit 3 applications a day, one interview per week
- Saving for a home: Deposit 7%of income into your account each week
- Paying off debt: Implement 1 money-saving habit/day, make a mini weekly payment
Setting measurable goals keeps you on-track and keeps everyone in the house happy about the arrangement.
If you are unsure of what you can do to be successful after college, we have a blog that will walk you through the process.
Tip #9 Resolve Issues Early
You are human, and your parents are human: issues are going to crop up. However, if you pretend like they’re not there, they have the potential to explode. With this in mind, be intentional about resolving issues as early as possible.
Addressing conflicts head-on prevents them from growing and allows everyone to reach a reasonable solution. Furthermore, moving back in with parents teaches you invaluable lessons about co-habitating to use down the road.
Tip #10 Ditch the Shame
The idea of moving back in with parents can feel like a regression, but it’s essential to let that mindset go.
- Keep working on your end-game
- Continue the practice of saving money
- Remain proactive about your goals
- Respect and enjoy the time with your folks
Stick to this plan, and we promise there’s no shame to moving back in with your parents.
Moving Back in With Your Parents: A Savvy Choice
Life after college can be a trying time. You deserve a double applause for getting your degree and making a savvy decision. Many millennials are choosing wisely to benefit from moving back in with parents. It’s one of the fastest ways to reach goals and set yourself up for a better life.
Now you have some insight into the potential pitfalls of the process. In addition, you are equipped with intelligent choices to navigate the challenges, so you can enjoy a smooth transition and an overall positive experience.
Don’t forget – Colonial Van Lines is here to help if you need moving or storage assistance or a simple moving quote! Contact us today to learn more.
