Some couples choose to move in together after only a few months of seeing each other, while other duos are content to keep their dwellings separate for years. Although there isn’t a universally agreed upon set of months or years to date before moving in together, it’s essential to be absolutely positive that you’re ready and that it’s what you both want before you schedule the movers.
More couples than ever before are moving in together before tying the knot. Cohabitation has increased by a staggering 900 percent over the last 50 years, according to a 2014 report published by the Council on Contemporary Families.
There isn’t any “one size fits all” formula to determine when the time is right to move in with your significant other, but there are some telltale signs that your relationship is ready to take the next big step.
In this article, we’ll cover signs that you’re ready to move in together, tips for a harmonious living situation, and what to do if it doesn’t work out.
Signs That You’re Ready to Move in Together
You’re past the honeymoon phase.
If you haven’t gotten in a fight or farted in front of each other, I hate to break it to you, but it’s too early. If your s/o seems perfect, you just don’t know them well enough yet or you’re being gaslit.
You’re rarely apart.
If you and your significant other are already spending 99% of your time together then you probably know pretty much everything about each other (including the less than perfect qualities).
If you spend most nights together, then you’ve likely accepted each other’s habits and idiosyncrasies. While you may not love certain things they do, you know you can deal with them. At this point, you’ve basically gotten a glimpse of what living together will be like.
Of course, spending a lot of time together shouldn’t be the deciding factor. You need to be genuinely enjoying the time spent together, too. If you’re bickering a lot now, it will only get worse if you share a space.
You can do “nothing” together.
Living with a s/o isn’t constant dates and endless romance. Most of the time, time is spent doing a whole lot of nothing together. If you feel like every time you see each other it has to be an ‘event’, you’re probably not ready to live together.
You travel well together.
Traveling with someone is one of the best ways to get to know someone, simply because of the intensive one-on-one time spent together during a trip. If you haven’t traveled together but are considering shacking up, take a trip first.
You know how to communicate effectively.
Arguments are bound to happen; it’s how you handle them as a couple that counts. Your arguments shouldn’t lead to days of the silent treatment, they should lead to compromise. If you’re able to empathize with one another and have productive arguments, then that’s a good sign of longevity.
You’re honest with each other.
Being vulnerable can be really difficult, but it’s an integral part of a successful relationship. You need to be comfortable being open and honest with each other before moving in together.
You plan to stay in it for the long haul.
Before moving in with a partner, you need to see a future with them. Moving in with a partner is usually a step toward building a life together. If you’re unsure about a potential future together, then hold off.
The people closest to you approve.
If your friends and family approve, it’s probably not a bad decision. Alternatively, if your friends or family don’t like your s/o, you definitely shouldn’t be moving in together, and it might be time to reevaluate your relationship.
Money isn’t the driving force.
Moving in with a partner for purely financial reasons is a recipe for disaster. You’d be better off finding a roommate on Craigslist.
Tips for Making it Work When You Move in with Your Significant Other
Discuss expectations ahead of time.
If you’re cleaner than your partner, or vice versa, you need to talk about what each of you expect in terms of cleaning duties. You don’t want to end up resenting each other because you feel like you’re parenting your partner. You should discuss how you’ll divvy up all chores and errands. You both need to be willing to do your part and compromise.
Decide how you plan to split the bills.
Talk about who’s paying for what before jumping the gun to avoid any unnecessary confrontation or confusion. Talking about money isn’t fun and it can be awkward, but it’s necessary before taking such a big step.
Talk about why you want to do this.
If you’re looking at moving in as a step toward marriage, you need to make sure that your s/o is on the same page.
Remember all of the good stuff.
Your partner is going to annoy you and you’re going to annoy them. When you’re with someone almost constantly, it’s inevitable. Sometimes, it’ll feel exhausting and difficult to even be in the same room as them. Remind yourself that you’re building a life with the person you love and if need be, give each other some space.
Prepare for the worst, hope for the best.
Moving in together is a huge decision that shouldn’t be taken lightly. If you break up, the consequences are severe. Even if you feel like nothing could possibly go wrong, you need to have a backup plan for the worst-case scenario.
As happy as you may be now, it’s important to think about the unpleasant “what ifs.” If it doesn’t work out, it doesn’t just involve heartbreak, but contracts and money too. Talking about what to do if it doesn’t work out doesn’t mean that you think your relationship is destined to fail, it’s just a sensible thing to do.
Moving in together can feel intimidating no matter how great the relationship is. But just because it’s intimidating it doesn’t mean that it’s the wrong choice. If you’re confident that you’re ready to take the next step in your relationship, living with the person you love can be an amazing experience. Deep down, you’ll know if the time is right.
If you’ve read this article and still want to move in with your s/o, congratulations! We’d love to help you move in together. When you hire us, you’ll get:
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Request our free rate quote today and let us help you move to the next chapter of the rest of your life.
